Petty Grievance

 This feels petty, but it's been bothering me.

Yesterday, I woke up to a text message from my mother asking me to drive my niece and nephew and some of their friends down to to the Pumpkin Roll (a local-ish craft fair and literal pumpkin rolling contest) that morning. She also left a phone message which was a little flustered and said what her text said. I wanted more information, so I called her.

She picked up, on the road with my brother to the Pumpkin Roll. She sort of explained what happened while her phone cut out. Apparently, there were too many people to fit in my sister-in-law's car. (Math tells me that either there were 5+ kids or my sister-in-law's car is too full of junk to seat five total people. My guess is too much junk.) My mom just assumed that I had called to say I would drive people down. And me, being a coward, just said okay. I said I needed to eat and shower and she said okay.

My sister-in-law texted asking me to be at her house in 10 minutes. I said I wanted to eat and shower. I needed 45 minutes to an hour.

After prep-work, I texted to say I was leaving. No response. I got to the driveway and my sister-in-law's car was gone. I texted to say I was there and waited and waited and waited and finally my niece and her friend appeared. Then drove them down.

Never got the complete story, but here's what I pieced together:

1. Friends of nephew and niece stayed over the night before so they could ride to the Pumpkin Roll.
2. All kids stayed up really late (or early).
3. Only my brother, who is selling art at the fair, was ready to go when my mom got to their house.
4. Some of the kids were meant to ride down with my mom.
5. It's unclear to me if any of the kids were awake and, if they weren't, if the adults tried to wake them up.
6. Mom and my brother left with no one else in the car because they had to get down to set up their booth.

The first thing that bothers me is that it was assumed that I would do it. There was a question presented to me, but it was only a formality.

The second thing is that no one forced the kids to be be ready on time. This is what would have happened when I was their age. If I had stayed up until 1 or 2 AM and had to be ready to go by 6:30 AM, I would have been forced to be ready or told to get in the car as I was and finish getting ready on the way. )Maybe it's a really good thing that I'm not a parent.)

I helped, you know, but I'm not happy I helped.

I feel used because others failed.

Feliz Día de los Muertos

Spent October watching horror and horror adjacent movies.

Here's what I watched:

• 10/4/26 - Arachnophobia
• 10/5/26 - Scream (1996), Scream 2
• 10/6/26 - Scream 3, Scream 4
• 10/7/26 - Scream (2022), Scream VI
• 10/8/26 - Night of the Living Dead (1968), Coraline
• 10/9/26 - 28 Days Later
• 10/10/26 - Pan's Labyrinth, The Rocky Horror Picture Show
• 10/11/26 - Evil Dead (1981), Evil Dead 2, Army of Darkness, Braindead (Dead Alive is the name it was released under in USA)
• 10/12/26 - Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz
• 10/13/26 - Carrie (1976), The Prophecy, The Prophecy II
• 10/14/26 - The Exorcist, The Little Shop of Horrors (1987)
• 10/15/26 - Hellraiser (1987), Repo! The Genetic Opera, Gremlins
• 10/16/26 - The Thing, Young Frankenstein
• 10/17/26 - The Shining, Rosemary's Baby, Misery
• 10/18/26 - The Fly (1986), The Sixth Sense, ParaNorman
• 10/19/26 - Jennifer's Body
• 10/20/26 - Scream 7, Dracula (1931)
• 10/21/26 - Frankenstein (1931), Bride of Frankenstein, The Invisible Man (1933), Re-Animator 
• 10/22/26 - Doctor Sleep
• 10/24/26 - Smile
• 10/26/26 - Smile 2, 28 Weeks Later
• 10/27/26 - Creature From the Black Lagoon, The Fly (1958)
• 10/28/26 - Seven
• 10/29/26 - 10 Cloverfield Lane, Event Horizon
• 10/30/26 - The Raven
• 10/31/26 - Halloween II (1981), Halloween III: Season of the Witch, Children of the Corn (1984)

Missed some days due to family stuff, but I think I watched a lot of good movies that's I'd be happy to watch again. Some that I don't want to watch again, either.

Farewell, Mon Capitaine

Based on this sketch, the sketch "Show & Tell" that also appeared that night, his appearance on Extras, and pretty much all of Blunt Talk, I think Mr. Stewart had a really great sense of humor.

Parents... amirite?

Went to the Valley and saw Wildwood today. It was great. Highly recommended.

But the movie's not what I want to write about...

I went with my parents. In the past few years they've dropped some guilt on me because I don't invite them to go to the movies with me. They won't go on their own, but if I'm going then they'll go to. Also, they said they would drive the 70 or so minutes there and back.

But that's not what I want to write about...

There's a scene in Wildwood, a homecoming. Warriors come home and their families come out to meet them. Lots of guys hugging kids. Then Niamh, the (only?) female warrior hugs a grown woman and my mom leans over to me and says, "Of course they had to that kind of a hug."

*sigh*

10 years ago, she never would have made a comment like that. NEVER. If she had noticed the moment in the movie, if it had bothered her, she never would have said anything. She would have let it pass.

She doesn't do that anymore.

My dad has become the same way.

All this is to say that they refuse to call my nephew by his chosen name and insist on calling him by the name he was given at birth. They refuse to call him him. They refuse to accept him as he is.

They came to me a month or so ago, when they learned the my nephew had started binding his chest. I told them that I didn't know about the binding, but I expected it was coming because of what he wrote in a blurb a year ago. They asked how I was okay with this... change. (They're word.)

I said that first and foremost, it's not about me. It's about him. It's about giving safety and, hopefully, love to a young person by accepting him as he is.

They both kind of looked at me like they were surprised at my statements. My mom said, "I guess you're just a better person than I am."

"It's not about being a good or better person," I said. "It's about my nephew and making something that's hard to do at anytime being done at a hard time in life and making sure he knows that there is at least one place that he's safe."

The conversation ended there.

My parents were so pro-homosexual when I was a kid. When other kids were using the word "gay" to mean something bad they sat me and my brothers down and explained why we shouldn't use it that way. There is nothing wrong or bad about being homosexual, they said. They said that if we used it that way we would be harming both ourselves and those who were gay.

I'm grateful they took the time to do that then.

I don't think my parents would do it today.

Happy Birthday!

Today, we are the same number of years old. But we’ll never be the same age, will we.

I started thinking about you a couple of weeks ago. While I was on breaks at work, I started a list of horror and horror adjacent movies to watch in October and The Rocky Horror Picture Show was a must watch. That was your favorite movie in high school. You watched it three or four times a week after you got your own copy of the video. In fact, I’m watching the movie right now because it’s your birthday and I was going to watch it anyway.

Remember the first time we watched it together? We borrowed C-----‘s copy. You took it home and watched it the first afternoon. I got it the second afternoon. And on Saturday we watched it together. You dragged me off the sofa and (forcefully) encouraged me to do the Time Warp with you. It was nice having a person who was more obsessed with this movie than I was. Someone who was willing and able to talk about the sheer… wonderfulness of it.

Anyway, the last time I saw you was at your wedding in the summer of 2007. You’ve stopped by my parents’ house when you were in their neck of the woods during holidays, but you were never there when I was. And I didn’t know where your parents had moved to. I knew the subdivision, but not which of the hundreds of houses was theirs or even which street they were on. I couldn’t search you out. I couldn’t even call you or email you because you had changed your phone number a few times and your email address, too, but never told me. Hell, the only reason I knew about your wedding was because you finally accepted my Facebook friend request the week before it took place and when I congratulated you, you invited me.

Not that I want to be like this, right now.

You were my best friend. Did you know that? I’m sure I never told you, but did you know? I think I was yours for a short time, too. It didn’t last though. You found others in our group that I think you liked more. I’m grateful for you and the time we had together, but I do wonder what happened sometime.

Not specifically to us, but in general, what happened to you.

You were so close with some of us, that I never expected you to cut certain people out of you life, but you did. You were especially close with two people and then you, well, hated them. When they were willing to write me back, neither one would explain why the sudden shift between the three of you from being so close. Close enough that there were rumors. From what information I have gathered, I have inferred that maybe one or more of you wanted to be closer in a way that others were unwilling or unable to be close and that forced you all apart. For a time, early in your college career, you were so happy that most of your friends were gay and then you had a falling out with them, too.

Did they ask you questions or imply things about you that you weren’t comfortable with?

I guess what I’m wondering is, are you still a fan of The Rocky Horror Picture Show? When your children discovered the movie, were you cool about it? When one fell in love with it, did you encourage that love?

Your brother was at my brother’s “Fuck Cancer! I’m Still Alive!” party last week. He said that you had moved to Australia, but not where on that continent. It’s a big place and a lot of it is hot, dry, and dusty. I hope your not out there, but are somewhere near beautiful beaches and far away from the horrifying spiders, but you were never that lucky before.

I think of you around this time each year.

I hope you and your family are well.

I hope you are happy and joyful more often than any other emotions.

I miss what we were.

Happy birthday.

2024 Saga Reader Survey

1. How’s your eyesight?

Without my glasses most everything is blurry, but I can still make out some details. The worst this is as my prescription settled down for distance, I started needing help to see up close. How can I be nearsighted and farsighted at the same time?

2. If you were a bird, what kind of bird would you be?

I’d be a kiwi. Probably a north island brown.

3. Are you worried about how artificial intelligence might impact your job?

A little. I work in human resources and don’t think the irony of replacing all the humans with computers is enough to stop it.

4. Pickleball: yea or nay?

I’m not a fan of the game, but I’m cool with other people playing.

5. Have you ever attended an anti-war demonstration?

Yeah, I attended a couple when Bush Jr. started his wars.

6. If you had to spend six months aboard the International Space Station with one breakfast cereal mascot, living or dead, which mascot would you choose?

Buzz the Bee.

7. Ever been involved in an automobile accident?

Fortunately, I have not been in any auto collisions.

8. What’s the hottest sex scene from a television program?

The sex between Gretchen and Jimmy in the first episode of You’re the Worst is pretty hot.

9. If you remember, how and when did you first start reading Saga?

I bought the first two trades to give as a gift, and as I do with all comics I give as a gift, I read them first. This was 2014 or 2015.

10. Possibly related: what were you up to in 2012?

I did a lot of interviewing for promotion.

11. Can you do crow pose?

I don’t know what “crow pose” is. Hold on.

…

No. No, I cannot.

12. This is definitely not a contest, but roughly how many “followers” do you have on social media?

I think I have about 60 followers on Tumblr and my Blogspot blog is only read by me and bots. I haven’t looked at Facebook since Trump 1.0 and the other sites I was part of I either deleted my accounts long ago or have disappeared from the interblah entirely.

13. Best compliment you’ve ever received?

A friend once told other friends that he thought I was the mostly likely person he knew to write like John Kennedy Toole. I have my doubts that I’ll ever live up to that, but it’s something worth striving for if I ever start writing again.

14. Variant covers: scourge of the comic book industry, fun collectible, or subject you couldn’t possibly care about less?

I don’t like them. I don’t like the creation of artificial scarcity. I think I’d be less anti variant if they put pictures of all the covers in the back of the issue so I could see them. I feel the same way about the extras in collected editions. I like floppies and I wish the behind-the-scenes stuff was also shared with floppy readers.

15. How many hours of sleep did you get last night?

About 4 hours. Sometime I get in a mood where I want to hold off tomorrow for as long as possible and since time disappears while I sleep, the only way to do that is to stay awake longer.

16. Hey, were you at the Eras Tour?

I don’t know what that is. Give me a sec.

…

No. I can appreciate Taylor Swift’s music when I hear it, but I’m not gonna go seeking it out.

17. Are you that mythical creature known as a homeowner?

I live in a house that that I’m slowly paying the bank for. If all goes well I will be a homeowner in about 25 years. Ugh. Forever from now.

18. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

If I have, no one told me.

19. Brian here, and this isn’t a binding poll, but for my next comics project, should I write Spider-Man, Superman, or something original?

If you need the cash, Superman. Otherwise, I’d like you to stick with original.

20. Do you have children? If not, do you think you might someday?

No. When I was a kid, I thought spouses and kids just sort of happened, but they’re not something I ever actively pursued.

21. Last time you attended a funeral?

The last real funeral with all the religious claptrap was 2003-ish for my great-grandmother. The last “Celebration of Life” I attended was in 2015 for a grandmother. I missed the “Celebration of Life” for my other grandma in 2023 because I had the flu and there were lots of old people who attended.

22. I don’t think I ever once drank water as a kid, did you?

My dad was (and still is) convinced that drinking water somehow is the cure for all headaches, colds, flus, and other ailments. When we said we felt bad, he’d hand us a glass of water and wait as we drank it.

23. What do you want, really?

To feel emotions again.

24. If you have a partner or partners, do you share your comics with them?

No, but I’m always willing to share my comics.

25. Are you working on anything cool at the moment?

Not at this time or in the foreseeable future.

2022 Saga Reader Survey

1. Do you love your job?

No, I don’t love it. I don’t hate it, either. I keeps me comfortable in a house with the occasional treat for myself and keeps the cat I live with in litter and food and treats.

2. How many pushups can you do?

Zero. I’m fat, lazy, and weak and often okay with that.

3. What are your pronouns?

I and me.

Okay, that’s not answering the question you’re actually asking, but it’s the answer I’m giving to this question.

4. Did that last question bother you?

Yes, I think so because this is the fourth time the surveys have asked about gender and I’d like to know why it’s so important/interesting to you. (I wouldn’t be surprised if people didn’t notice this because each survey is written so far apart and how often are new readers reading the floppies rather than a collection.)

Over the summer, I watched a bunch of old Saturday Night Live sketches from my early years watching the show (’88 or ’89 was when I started watching.) and I was reintroduced to the “Pat” sketches. I was shocked to learn that people hated these sketches because they think the sketches are transphobic. To me, as a kid and an adult, the joke is that everyone who wasn’t Pat was afraid to interact with Pat without being able to attach a gender. They would ask, often absurd questions, trying to figure out Pat’s gender so they knew if they should talk about football or ballroom dancing. Like they can only know how to talk to a human being based on their gender rather than just talk to Pat as a PERSON. To me, the joke is that Pat is great and happy and cool with all people and everyone else is a fucking idiot for believing genitals are the defining feature of how we interact with one another.

For all I know you’ve asked this question often for market research or pure curiosity or some other reason. I don’t think the story is being tailored toward a demographic. I’m just curious why you are so interested.

5. Other than the incomparable Fiona Staples, who’s your favorite comic artist?

I’ve been cataloging my floppies and that involves a lot, probably too much, of leafing through the books. I looked at Cerebus again and while the creator is a problem, Gerhard’s work is amazing and not enough people talk about it. His backgrounds are so intricate, but they don’t distract from the main action of the story.

6. What do you smell like?

Cumin comes to mind.

7. Who’s the best bald fictional character who is NOT a villain?

Captain Benjamin Layfette Sisko.

8. Ketchup: yay or nay?

I fall on the “yay” side of things. It just shouldn’t overwhelm what it’s put on.

9. Have you ever killed someone?

Not that I am aware of.

10. What was the #1 movie in America on the day you were born (which you can apparently discover online at https://playback.fm/birthday-movie)?

The Champ, which I looked up and, well, I have to hear lots of good things about a boxing movie before I seek it out.

11. What’s the most famous person you’ve ever touched?

Amanda Palmer. At a concert she was walking through the audience while singing and touched my shoulder and said that she liked my hoodie. This was well before the shit came to light. I decided not to see her in concert later this year because of the moral complications.

12. Do you believe in angels?

I think I believe in the possibility of mythological angels (four heads, eight wings, flaming wheels of eyes), but haven’t had any experiences with angels and am not good at blind faith. I’m a faith but verified kind of person.

13. Is there a podcasts you think we should be listening to?

There aren’t any that I regularly listen to recommend.

14. What did you lose during the pandemic?

It wasn’t because of COVID-19, but I lost my mind due to lithium poisoning during the pandemic.

15. What did you gain?

Freedom from unwanted social situations.

16. Are you fairly “accurate” representation of your astrological sign?

No. Not in any culture’s astrology that I’ve read about. The vagaries are not vague enough for me to see myself in them. It’s really funny when people who take astrology seriously learn about my sign and then flounder trying to make me, as they understand me, fit. One person told me I was an exception that proved the rule.

17. How’s your local comic shop doing?

We haven’t had a local comic shop in more than 20 years. The closest comic shop is more than an hour’s drive away.

At least we had one when I was a kid. It was run by a lovely woman named Helen –  who was willing to argue with me on how, exactly, Superman came back from the dead – and her grumpy husband who resented that they couldn’t make rent by only selling coins and stamps.

18. Are you happy?

I’ve been emotionally numb since the lithium poisoning. Happy doesn’t quite registered yet.

19. What would it take for you to be happier?

It’s been five years since I stopped taking lithium. I keep being told that I need time. Things are better than they were. I no longer burn all my concentration at work and can focus on reading before going to sleep again. I have hope that I’ll be happier some day.

20. Do you have any trophies?

I have a plaque for being employee of the month in a drawer at work. I remember getting a trophy for a pinewood derby and winning my age group in the Pumpkin Roll, but either they are buried at my parents’ house or I tossed them.

21. What’s the best sandwich you’ve ever eaten?

When I worked at a locally owned sandwich shop, the sandwich I’d make for myself for lunch everyday was on a sourdough roll, mustard on both sides, lettuce, pickles, onion, swiss cheese, genoa salami, smoked ham, pepperoni, capocollo, and provolone cheese. The owner did not like pepperoni, so it was never put on the menu, but there were a few (very few) who would order it when I was the only one working.

22. How is/was your relationship with your grandparents?

I think it was pretty good for the ones who have died and is still good with the one who’s alive.

23. Do you have any addictions?

Maybe television.

24. What’s one good quality of someone you hate?

I can’t think of anyone who I’ve hated. When I don’t like people I don’t spend time with them enough to learn to hate them.

25. In case we lose your envelope and need to send you prizes, would you please shar your name and address below.

No, thanks.