Adventures in Anxiety

--or--
Do I function in real life?

So, tomorrow is David Willis's birthday and he's at WonderCon. Since I've been enjoying his work for the past seven years and it's his first time at this convention and it's his birthday, I bought him a birthday card. (It's a Batman: The Brave and the Bold card that plays the theme song when you push the button in the corner. I almost got one that had pictures of hamsters because it looked like he could have drawn the card, but there was no way to turn off the annoying song when the card is opened, and like I said I like the guy's work.)

I get the card. I take the card with me to the con. I sign the card and shove a few bucks in it (one for each year I've been reading his online stuff). I panic and decide I not to give it to him. I wander up and down the aisles and there's his table.

Then I reach into my backpack and pull out the card. I stop and start my way to through the crowd. I stand in front of his table and take a deep breath. I stammer and stutter out something about enjoying his work (I hope that's what I said), hand him the card, and say happy birthday. He thanks me for the card and I say your welcome. He asks me if I want a sketch.

My brain screams, "YES! YES! YES! Amber and Arthur, from The Tick awkwardly posing for a photo!" My stomach screams, "I'm going to barf! GET OUT OF HERE!" My mouth stutters, "N-no, thanks, b-but I really appreciate it." And I hurried away.

Now, for my own sanity, I have to assume that he's met weird fans before. Probably mostly people (let's face it, guys) who just hang around the table and want to talk and talk and talk. Transformers, the Walkyverse, whatever, but they don't go away and think that he's their friend and must be their friend because they're read his online comics. So, I can't be the only weird fan who's ever visited him, right? But how many panic and run?

Days like this make me surprised that I can get out of the house and function in the world.