Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Snow At My Parents'

The back deck, at my parents', on the 23rd.

The back deck this morning.The back deck this morning.

And, apparently, all the schools in the county are closed due to snow. In all my years going to school in that county, I never had a snow day, a few 1 hour delays, but nothing more than that.

I wish I had some snow here.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007


I spent my lunch hour wandering around the Barnes & Noble that's two blocks away. I didn't buy anything, I just wandered around looking at the crappy books on the bargin tables and through the magazines. I picked up a few books and magazines and read the back cover or thumbed through them, but nothing deeper than that.

I just haven't had the concentration today to sit and read.

Even on my 15 minute breaks I can't just sit and focus on my book. I get halfway though a page and my mind starts to wander and I start to wallow.

It's cold here. Well, cold for here, not for many places across North America. As I walked to work, it was raining and the temperature was at 34 F. At lunch it was raining and around 44 F. I find the temperature refreshing. It's closer to the way winter should feel. (Yes, I do realize that if the temperature was hovering around freezing from November until May I probably wouldn't feel this way, but I live in California and most of the places where people live don't get like that. Especially this year.) I'm jealous that my parents and my friends who live in Cowtown had snow, but it's nice having the cold for a while.

One thing I don't like, though, is that air here, as I walk to work, smells and tastes like cars, even though I don't see or hear any cars going down the road. Back in Cowtown on cold mornings after, or during, a rain storm the air smells fresh and crisp and doesn't taste like anything. I miss that.

Monday, February 26, 2007


I got an odd letter on Saturday that has really... upset me.

Hell, I'm not sure if "upset" is the right word, but this letter has made sleeping hard to do. It caused me to wake up before six on Sunday and not be able to fall back asleep. Every waking moment since I got this letter I've just wanted to sink through the floor and then down into the ground through hundreds of feet of rock and just stay there for the rest of my life.

The letter also came on top of me spending more than $400 for something that I really want. I don't know how much I'll actually use it, but I really want to use it. Besides, I need some sort of a dream, don't I. Still, as soon as I ordered it, I started regretting the ordering because it costs so much money. Yes, I have the money, and no spending this money won't affect my ability to move somewhere else, but I doubt. I think it could be saved. It could go toward paying off my credit card. It could go toward loans. It could go toward a trip somewhere, anywhere. It could go to things that are so much more responsible than what I actually purchased.

So, basically, I feel like a spider button, a balloon knot, a tar star, a whale eye, a leather donut, a pucker tube, pick your euphemism, and I don't know why.

The List For 2-21-07

span style="font-style:italic;">Ion: Guardian of the Universe #11
52 #42
Star Trek: The Next Generation: The Space Between #2
Civil War #7
The Helmet of Fate: Black Alice
1602: Fantistick Four #3
1602: Fantistick Four #4


There were problems last week. So there was nothing written here. Not that anyone cares, since I'm the only one who reads this page. Oh, well. Onward.

52 #42
Thank you, 52 team, for finally bringing back Ralph Dibney as a hero again. It was sublime to watch him win by using his brain again. And thank you for allowing Darick Robertson the opportunity to draw this chapter. He's one of only a few pencilers out there who always drew a stretching Ralph with lots of energy when he's stretching. There's only one penciler I would have preferred drawing this issue, but he died more than 10 years ago. Thanks, for this awesome issue.

The Helmet of Fate: Black Alice

So, what was this group of one shots for? The helmet really only played a major part in the first book and for these past three, it's just a hook to hang a story on. The helmet is pretty useless, isn't it? Well, maybe not to Detective Chimp, but it was to Ibis and Sargon and now Alice. At least next issue features Zauriel, hopefully that'll be cool.

Civil War #7
But more on that later this week.

Friday, February 23, 2007

The Oscars, 2007

When the Oscar nominations were announced last month, I realized that this will be the first time in 15 years that I will not be watching the Oscars, in part, live. When I was younger and it got late (or time for Lois & Clark, if it was a new one) I'd tape the rest of the show and watch it the next day after school. This year, I can not even tape the thing. It makes me a little sad that on Sunday I won't be eating so much microwave popcorn that my tongue is sore for days after while watching the glitz and glamour of a meaningless, but fun, awards ceremony.

Even though I won't be watching them, I thought I throw out my choices to win, anyway.

Leonardo DiCaprio in Blood Diamond
Ryan Gosling in Half Nelson
Peter O’Toole in Venus
Will Smith in The Pursuit of Happyness
Forest Whitaker in The Last King of Scotland

I actually haven't seen any of these movies, but I'd be happy if either PeterO'Toole or Forest Whitaker win. They both should have won years ago. Both bury themselves in they're roles so well that if the make-up was a bit thicker, I'd have a hard time figuring out who was playing their characters.

Penélope Cruz in Volver
Judi Dench in Notes on a Scandal
Helen Mirren in The Queen
Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada
Kate Winslet in Little Children

Penélope Cruz's breast should win for their amazing performance in Volver, but since just parts of an actor can not win, I choose, like everyone else, Helen Mirren for one of the most controlled and emotional performances ever on film. Just looking into her eyes in The Queen I could see that there was so much emotion being supressed to show strength and tradition to the people of England. She was outstanding. And it'd be nice for her to win for playing both Queen Elizabeths.

Alan Arkin in Little Miss Sunshine
Jackie Earle Haley in Little Children
Djimon Hounsou in Blood Diamond
Eddie Murphy in Dreamgirls
Mark Wahlberg in The Departed

While I'm expecting Eddie Murphy to pull in the win, I'd really like to see Alan Arkin win for playing a crusty, but caring grandfather. His character was the one with the most life in him when Little Miss Sunshine started. And the way you could see how much he loved his granddaughter was wonderful. Here's hoping he pulls it off.

Adriana Barraza in Babel
Cate Blanchett in Notes on a Scandal
Abigail Breslin in Little Miss Sunshine
Jennifer Hudson in Dreamgirls
Rinko Kikuchi in Babel

Jennifer Hudson was lucky. She got to play the best female characer in Dreamgirls. And she nailed it. Yes, the woman who didn't become the Idol was specactular.

The Departed
Letters from Iwo Jima
The Queen
United 93

Although I'd like Scorsese to win, finally, I'm going with Frears and The Queen on this. It was a quiet, nuainced film. Sort of gentle in it's appoach. Startling and nice. I don't know exactly how to put it, but it was just what was needed.

The Good German
Notes on a Scandal
Pan’s Labyrinth
The Queen

Pan’s Labyrinth's score was shocking and sweet and brutal and better than anything else I've heard this year.

Borat Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
Children of Men
The Departed
Little Children
Notes on a Scandal

Children of Men. See it. Read it. Understand it.

Letters from Iwo Jima
Little Miss Sunshine
Pan’s Labyrinth
The Queen

Pan’s Labyrinth, for the same reason the score should win.

Happy Feet
Monster House

Cars. The others may have been more original, storywise, but they weren't better.

The Departed
Letters from Iwo Jima
Little Miss Sunshine
The Queen

Little Miss Sunshine should win, just for its oddness and crazy characters.

At My Parents', Early This Morning

Out the front door.

Out the back door.

Swiped from my mom's website.

I wish it had done this while I was visiting last week. I may have walked around a lake, but I'd have rather taken a walk in the snow.


Even though I never met her and actually think she was disgusting, I am the father of Anna Nicole's baby, Dani Lynn.

I am the one who is entitled to raise the baby in the comfort that her probable billions will provide. It'll only be the best for the baby.

I promise I won't take advantage of the situation.

I promise, really.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

And I Was Worried I Wouldn't Have Anything To Write Today

Whenever something has to be done around here because someone is sick or on vacation or it's just something that has to happen occasionally, I'm the one who does it. Usually without being asked.


Because I'm a sucker who, deep inside, still thinks that being responsible and working hard and doing well is more important than trying to shove my head up the boss's ass. I know I'm wrong. I know that the world doesn't really work that way, but there's this strange kernel of hope inside me because I don't like the smell of my boss's ass.


Today is the day of the week that our office gets to open up half of the 4th floor conference room so the overflow of attorneys and others won't just be hanging around in the lobby or right outside the front door. Although, early on, I didn't know this, nor did I care.

SUSM, the current supervisor, walked up to me and said, "Do you want to get the key for the room."

"Not today," I said.

She looked at me. She blinked. She turned to BBNG and told him to go get the key and open up the room.

About that time, I learned that the woman who usually gets the mail ready and takes it down to the mail room was out sick for the day. I put this bit of information out of my mind quickly, though, because it had no immediate impact on my day, but I should have remembered.

When I got back from lunch and had just unlocked my computer, SUSM called across the room, "I WANT YOU TO DO THE MAIL TODAY!"

"Okay," I said and rolled my eyes away from her.

Two-forty-five happened upon me and I had to rush to get the boxes ready to be shipped because the DHL (the stupid wankers) has to be called before three or they won't come and pick up the packages. I really hate using this company.

So I stayed back there to do the mail. I separated the envelopes into several piles: 1. already stamped, but need to be sealed 2. sealed, but no stamp 3. not sealed, not stamped, and over an ounce 4. not sealed, not stamped, and under an ounce. After I ran those through the machine, which jammed four or five times on me, I remembered all the mail that the secretaries are too lazy to stick in envelopes that I get to do. And I did them.

Here's the biggest problem with doing the mail, for me at least, the damn table back there is right at ball level and when I have to reach for empty envelopes or address labels or a pen, I squish my nut sack and feel this pain that radiates from my nethers and swoops around to my lower back. Standing on tip-toes helps, but if my ankles get tired because I have to spend a while searching for the right address, my feet settle and my testes get mashed in a whole new way.

Yes, I mashed my balls several times while getting the mail ready. I doubt there's any bruising, but it's still annoying.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Ash Wednesday

Today is Ash Wednesday. Did you know that?

I didn't, until I got to work and was speaking with one of the ladies. Earlier, I saw her fiddling with the copy machine before we spoke. As we were speaking, I noticed a black and gray smudge on her forehead. And, thinking it was toner, I told her.

"It's Ash Wednesday," she said.

"Oh," I said.

"Yeah," She said.

And I walked away.

I always thought that those Ash Wednesday people were supposed to have a cross put on their forehead, not a smudge. My guess is that she couldn't stop herself from playing with it and she smeared it all over.

After the awkward conversation, I looked Ash Wednesday up on Wikipedia to find out what, exactly, the ashes symbolize and where the use of the ashes came from. What, I wanted to know, are the origins of Ash Wednesday?

Wikipedia was very little help to me. It says something about the ashes have something to do with reminding people that they are really nothing ("Remember, man, that you are dust, and unto dust you shall return.") which really doesn't seem to jive with all the stuff Jesus was talking about. There's also the suggestion that it's a penance, but if it's something that all "good" Christians do and they're proud of it, is it really a penance?

Besides, what was Jesus doing 46 days before he escaped his tome and said "Hey." to some guys he knew? Was he rolling around in some cinders making an ash of himself? I doubt it.

I'd like to know, in 500 words or less (less would be preferable), how Ash Wednesday started, why the ashes go on the forehead, what this has to do with a good guy getting nailed to a tree for saying we should all just get along?

I'll do my best not to get this way on Palm Sunday, but I still wonder, is it okay for normal people to walk on the palm fronds on that day, or are they only meant as a symbolic welcoming of Jesus into the churches? (Which seems odd to my. Why only welcome Jesus into your church one day a year?)

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

My Brain Is Frazzled

I should have tried writing this earlier. Like when I first got to work, but I couldn't. Strange things are afoot. Strange things that are turning me into a worrier and keeping me from sleeping well at night, or, at least, last night, quite possibly tonight will be better, that remains to be known.

Anyway, I think the interview and test went very well.

The test was really easy. The first part was picking the best word (or words) to complete the sentence. The second part was about picking the correct word (think two, to, and too). The third part was reading a paragraph and answering questions about it. And the final part was math--adding, subtracting, multiplying, and dividing, nothing more challenging--and I was given a calculator.

The interview was very comfortable. One of the first questions I was asked, before I even sat down, was if I dressed up for Halloween and then they told me about how last Halloween they hired a choreographer to teach them how to do the Thriller dance. The one guy who was interviewing me laughed at my Olympics joke. One lady got excited about the TV show Heroes and when I said I hadn't watched it because I don't have TV right now she took the time to explain it to me. The other lady went to the same school and graduated from the same department as me.

The interview didn't feel like an interrogation. It felt like they wanted to get to know me and to see if my square peg could fit comfortably in their round hole.

Now I just have to wait some more.

And thanks to all who sent their good vibes, even if the first of the bunch was written about an hour after the interview.

Oh, to answer the couple of questions in that last post, it's never too late for good vibes. And I did buy a new tie. In fact I bought one of those shirt/tie combo packs (on sale!) so I'd have them match. (I'm not good with the whole matching thing. I happen to like plaid and strips together.)

Thursday, February 15, 2007


I'm off to my interview. Good vibes, please.

Test! Again

I'm Joshua Abraham Norton, the first and only Emperor of the United States of America!
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
From the fecund loins of Rum and Monkey.

Born in England sometime in the second decade of the nineteenth century, you carved a notable business career, in South Africa and later San Francisco, until an entry into the rice market wiped out your fortune in 1854. After this, you became quite different. The first sign of this came on September 17, 1859, when you expressed your dissatisfaction with the political situation in America by declaring yourself Norton I, Emperor of the USA. You remained as such, unchallenged, for twenty-one years.

Within a month you had decreed the dissolution of Congress. When this was largely ignored, you summoned all interested parties to discuss the matter in a music hall, and then summoned the army to quell the rebellious leaders in Washington. This did not work. Magnanimously, you decreed (eventually) that Congress could remain for the time being. However, you disbanded both major political parties in 1869, as well as instituting a fine of $25 for using the abominable nickname "Frisco" for your home city.

Your days consisted of parading around your domain - the San Francisco streets - in a uniform of royal blue with gold epaulettes. This was set off by a beaver hat and umbrella. You dispensed philosophy and inspected the state of sidewalks and the police with equal aplomb. You were a great ally of the maligned Chinese of the city, and once dispersed a riot by standing between the Chinese and their would-be assailants and reciting the Lord's Prayer quietly, head bowed.

Once arrested, you were swiftly pardoned by the Police Chief with all apologies, after which all policemen were ordered to salute you on the street. Your renown grew. Proprietors of respectable establishments fixed brass plaques to their walls proclaiming your patronage; musical and theatrical performances invariably reserved seats for you and your two dogs. (As an aside, you were a good friend of Mark Twain, who wrote an epitaph for one of your faithful hounds, Bummer.) The Census of 1870 listed your occupation as "Emperor".

The Board of Supervisors of San Francisco, upon noticing the slightly delapidated state of your attire, replaced it at their own expense. You responded graciously by granting a patent of nobility to each member. Your death, collapsing on the street on January 8, 1880, made front page news under the headline "Le Roi est Mort". Aside from what you had on your person, your possessions amounted to a single sovereign, a collection of walking sticks, an old sabre, your correspondence with Queen Victoria and 1,098,235 shares of stock in a worthless gold mine. Your funeral cortege was of 30,000 people and over two miles long.

The burial was marked by a total eclipse of the sun.

Just a few year and a few drinks and I could be this guy myself. Cool.

Thanks for the test, Choochoo.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

...was gonna...

I was gonna write something about the day that is today by way of an odd conversation (but not really a conversation) that I had yesterday, but stupidity in the work-place has prevented me from doing anything I wanted to.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

The List For 2-7-07

Shazam!: The Monster Society of Evil #1
52 #40
Green Lantern #16
newuniversal #3
Ion: Guardian of the Universe #10


Ion: Guardian of the Universe #10
Has anything in the way of a coherent story happened in this book since Kyle got off of Mogo? Yeah, I enjoyed the gladiator issue--it was fun--but I keep thinking that Kyle should stop thinking of his power as ring based, or at least based in his hands, and start using his whole body. This issue was interesting, what with bringing the Bleed to the DCU and having Captain Atom admit to mucking around in the Wildstorm Universe, but I was hoping for some real storytelling between the Tangent characters and Kyle, but that didn't happen, he just banished them back to the lantern. And the thing that really pissed me off is how Kyle just ran the lantern back to OA and handed it over to the Guardians without even wondering about the thing. What happened to his curiosity?

newuniversal #3
I guess this is for fans of the old New Universe because I'm just not interested in what's going on here. I bought this one hoping that Mr. Ellis would do something intriguing. He didn't. I'll probably buy the next issue and the one after that hoping the same thing. Please, please, live up to possible potential.


The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Low
Level 2 (Lustful)High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Very High
Level 7 (Violent)Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Test

The wretched King Minos has decided your fate. His tale wraps around his body 6 times.

The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes. Your shade has been banished to... the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis!

Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis

You approach Satan's wretched city where you behold a wide plain surrounded by iron walls. Before you are fields full of distress and torment terrible. Burning tombs are littered about the landscape. Inside these flaming sepulchers suffer the heretics, failing to believe in God and the afterlife, who make themselves audible by doleful sighs. You will join the wicked that lie here, and will be offered no respite. The three infernal Furies stained with blood, with limbs of women and hair of serpents, dwell in this circle of Hell.

I was sure I'd end up on level 1 or 2.

I got this from Jazz.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Spewing Bile!

Anna Nicole Smith is dead!

Allow me to be among the earliest to say that with her passing the brightness of the world has not dimmed by one photon. Yes, it's horrible that her daughter has to grow up without a mother, but that doesn't mean that this media whore who used the birth of her daughter and the death of her son to grab time on the television and words in the newspapers from stories that are more worthy added anything of real value to life on this planet.

A Question

Do you pronounce the word "squirrel" with and "-er" or an "-ear"?

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

News, Everyone.

I have scheduled a test and an interview (the test it sort of part of the interview, I guess) for next Thursday in Cowcity. I will be submitting for time off tomorrow. I may take Friday off as well and really extend my weekend. (It's President's Day the next Monday.)

I should probably go out an buy a tie. I don't thing Garfield will go over well.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

The List for 1-31-07

Uncle Sam and the Freedom Fighters #7
Ex Machina #26
Eternals #6
Strangers in Paradise #87
Ultimate Fantastic Four #38
Sandman Mystery Theatre: Sleep of Reason #2
Jack of Fables #7
PVP #30
Fables #57
52 #39

Strangers in Paradise #87
Now I know how Francine gets pregnant with David's baby, but without a jump or two into the future I don't think this book will ever feel like it's ended and I don't see how Mr. Moore is going to be able to give me a good sense of closure in only three more issues.

Uncle Sam and the Freedom Fighters #7
Well, Ray Terrill is back, with a crappy collar. This mini has only been okay and I don't think the final issue will make it seem any better.

Fables #57
Pinocchio has never looked this much like a little kid before. It was sort of creepy. The other stuff was great though. This is a book that I look forward to every month.

PVP #30
I started getting this comic because I wanted to give some money to a guy who produces a free comic that I enjoy. I remember him writing on his site that he would add strips to fill out stories. I also remember that when the time travel storyline happened daily he thought that he had ended it too soon, that there was more story to tell. I had hoped that he would tell more of the story in this issue of the comic. He didn't. I am very disappointed.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Friday, February 02, 2007

My Hourly Comic

This all took place yesterday between waking-up and falling asleep.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Happy Hourly Comic Day!

To learn what it is, go here and here.

To see the hourly comics by the man who created it all, go here.

To see the hourly comics created for today by the people with scanners, go here.

I've been doing an hourly comic tody. So far, I have ten. Number eleven will be worked on after I post this.

If I can find a scanner, I'll be sharing mine by next Monday. It depends on if I think I have to darken them at all.

Oh, and I should probably apoligize to/thank John Campbell, the guy who created the hourly comic, because I totally stole his way of drawing people. So, thanks/I'm sorry, John.

Quote Of The Day

We’re comic fans, we eat homoerotic undertones for lunch.
From this post at Blog@Newsarama by this poster.


I'm not much of a zombie person. I think that most people who make zombie stories today forget that the really horrifing thing about them are that they just slow moving brutes who will overwhelm you because they can't be stopped.

That written, I'll be at the theater for American Zombie when it comes out, because you know it has to.